Wedding Island: where Mr. Rourke and Tattoo make your fantasies come true. Oops, that’s Fantasy Island. On Wedding Island, wedding planner Sandy Malone and employees do their best to make sure brides have their perfect wedding. The title is self-explanatory, the show is about planning island weddings.

Wedding Island takes place on the Puerto Rican island of Vieques. Unlike the main island, which has over 3.5 million people, Vieques has less than 10,000 residents and is only 21 miles long and 4 miles wide. The island only has one baker and one rental company, which means there is a very real possibility that something may not arrive on time or even at all. On top of that, there are no flowers on the island, so flowers have to be flown in from elsewhere. As Sandy points out, anywhere else, she could get in her car and drive to the florist. In Vieques, the flowers she ordered may die on the runway from neglect and the only thing she can do is yell, which is not a problem for Sandy.

Sandy likes to scream at people, even though she denies it. Granted, sometimes vendors deserve it and brides can be difficult, but Sandy can outscream Janet Leigh. If her business, Weddings in Vieques goes out of business, she could easily audition for horror movies.

It doesn’t help that Sandy does not seem like a nice person. Most residents of Vieques speak Spanish and very little English. Sandy claims her Spanish is good, which it is for an English-speaking visitor first learning the language, but she has lived the island for 8 years. Her Spanish should be better than “Hola, now I’m going to speak to you in English, a language you don’t understand, and get mad when you have no clue what I’m saying.”

If this comment from Wendy TLC’s website is to be believed, Sandy’s treatment of the brides isn’t much better than how she treats the islanders.

Funny, we got married in Vieques. Beautiful place, but Sandy is one of the worst human beings we ever met. She is condescending to the couple, rude to family and guests, doesn’t pay attention or take decent notes during phone calls, fails to show up to meetings with information she promised, doesn’t keep an up-to-date budget or make any attempt to stay within budget, etc. She of course charges a percent on all arrangements she makes on your behalf, but this includes all of the arrangements she makes with herself (like renting chairs and tents from herself), which seems a bit shady. Of course, during the wedding you’ll be blessed with her constant presence as she drinks and chain smokes into the night. Our wedding was great, but as seconded by everybody we spoke with, you only work with Sandy because she’s the only gig in town and Vieques is too far away to make arrangements yourself.

Wendy’s observation clarifies a lot of questions about Sandy and Wedding Island. On the show, Sandy always blames other people for anything that goes wrong, which happens all the time. In hindsight, it is fairly obvious that Sandy does not take many notes and expects the brides to provide detailed lists, even after they have a conversation explaining everything and Sandy could have written down the plans herself. It would be more professional, if she took notes herself and followed with consulting the bride to make sure everything is correct. Unfortunately, brides who want to get married on Vieques have only one choice: deal with Sandy. They will get a nice wedding, but it will come with a huge headache.

Fans of TLC’s other wedding shows, may be disappointed because the show focuses on Sandy and her business, not the brides. Reality TV junkies should like the show because Sandy is a raving lunatic, who wouldn’t be out of place flipping tables on The Real Housewives.