Classic television themes are instantly recognizable. If a theme words, you can sing them. If it doesn’t, you can hum it. However, some classic themes have words that only hardcore fans are aware exist. Others theme songs have words that I swear exist solely to be put on lists like this one. Either way, the lyrics do not actually enhance most of the songs and are better off as answers to obscure trivia questions.

8. Hogan’s Heroes

The “Hogan’s Heroes March” never needed lyrics. The song perfectly fits Hogan’s Heroes without it. While the lyrics don’t totally kill the song, since they are sung by Robert Clary (Lebeau), Richard Dawson (Newkirk), Larry Hovis (Carter), and Ivan Dixon (Kinchloe), they don’t exactly add anything to the song and are quite ridiculous even by Hogan’s Heroes standards. Seriously, this song starts with “heroes, heroes, husky men of war”, goes on to use the word “ear-o’s”, and then has the singers praise themselves for being heroes. If the premise of Hogan’s Heroes didn’t doom the show from the start, these lyrics certainly would have. Thankfully, they were never intended for use on the show.

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